Blame

Often times I experience people who appear happy on the outside yet display something else in a much more subtle way. One of the skills I acquired during my lifetime is to recognize when what a person is saying does not match what they are not saying. This often comes across as deceit. I have learned never to assume that people that exhibit this behavior are intentionally being deceitful to me (or to whomever they are speaking), but may be being somewhat deceitful to themselves, may be trying on a new attitude or mindset, or may possible be uncomfortable.

One thing that stands out to me is a pattern of blame. When I experience someone who has a habit of blaming everything on something or someone else, it is usually indicative of general unhappiness. Sometimes it is about control. When something is out of our control it is much easier to blame it this or that, rather than hold ourselves accountable. NOT blame ourselves, hold ourselves accountable for how we feel, hoe we respond, and our behavior in the face of any circumstance.

Lately, during these especially trying times of uncertainty, I see more and more blame; blame China, blame Trump, blame the left, blame the right, blame the government, the CDC, aliens, bats soup, shadow government, you name it.

Blame dis-empowers us. It adds to the helplessness we feel and to the pain of uncertainty. It perpetuates the need to feel certain and significant during stressful times. Our need to be right surpasses our desire to be happy. Our need for structure and surety replaces our curious, adventurous selves.

Fear does some amazing things to us. It makes us do crazy things, courageous things, pragmatic things, smart things, dumb things, and sometimes things that we would never think of. It’s important to keep a cool head, and not let fear and panic get in the way of getting through this.

What are you focused on? Are you thinking about how 2 weeks stuck with your family of by yourself will drive you crazy, or are you thinking of tackling to that chore you’ve been putting off? Are you focused on what’s going to happen if the emergency gets extended, or are you focused on eating well and staying healthy? You have a choice! Chose wisely.

There are many things we can do to feel certain and safe, loved and appreciated, important and significant. What do you need? How can I help? How can you help someone who needs what you need? Give a little, get a lot. Helping your family, loved ones, and friends stay calm and safe will put you in that place. Try It On!

Stay calm, get some fresh air, go for a walk, get some exercise, teleconference with friends and family, learn a new skill, read a good book, there are endless positive things to focus on.

Peace, Love, and Light

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